1, 2, 3, 4!

I’m gettin’ nuttin’ for Christmas

‘Cause I ain’t been nothin’ but bad

I held out for Gruden way too long

Somebody snitched on me

I hollered no for the guy in Ohio

Somebody snitched on me

We couldn’t get Cutcliffe back

We tried Gundy but that fell through

Even botched the deal at Purdue

Somebody snitched on me

By Steve Williams

Tennessee football fans won’t find lumps of coal in their stockings this holiday season after all.

With Phillip Fulmer being named athletics director at UT a couple of weeks ago, it even feels like Christmas came early for Volunteer sports fans.

Fulmer gave us new head football coach Jeremy Pruitt, who appears to be in the process of giving us a team like we used to have in the good ole days.

If only next month were August.

Nevertheless, I believe we’ll have an off-season filled with positive thoughts and new hope.

For other sports’ wishes, here’s my letter to the North Pole:


Dear Santa:

Give the national sports media a clue and UT football fans the last laugh.

Give the NCAA some mathematical sense and an eight-team football playoff bracket (Five conference champions won’t fit into four playoff berths).

Give Tiger Woods a great comeback season.

Give Rick Barnes a Big Orange blazer to wear and honor Ray Mears.

Give the Lady Vols another game against UConn.

Give Ernest T. Bass all of Butch’s leftover bricks.

Give major league baseball more players like Jose Altuve.

Give Giancarlo Stanton back to the Miami Marlins.

Give Tom Brady a few more seasons.

Give tennis another rivalry like Connors versus McEnroe.

Give UT softball another Monica Abbott.

Give Gibbs High softball Carol Mitchell Field.

Give UT athletics more loyal fans like sports radio caller Roger.

Give North Carolina its long overdue NCAA suspension.

Give high school football coaches more money and college coaches less.

Give the NBA a shorter season.

Give NASCAR the good ole days.

Give college football fewer bowl games.

Give the TSSAA football playoffs only teams with .500 records or better.

Give the Heisman Trophy to a left offensive tackle someday.

Give sports more people like Lou Gehrig, Tamika Catchings, Jackie Robinson and Pat Summitt.

Give youth sports more people like Larry Cox.

Give referees the ability to make the tough call with the game on the line.

Give women’s college basketball a mercy rule.

Give major league baseball another third baseman like Brooks Robinson.

Give the SEC basketball media a new crystal ball, after picking the Vols to finish 13th in the conference.

Give Antonio Brown the NFL’s MVP award.

Give George Quarles a job on the UT coaching staff someday.

Give all players, coaches and fans good sportsmanship in victory and defeat.

Give every dog a home and a stick to retrieve and every cat a warm lap to curl up in and purr.

Give every boy and girl a ball and a chance to play.

Give the world peace, civility and gratitude.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!