By Joe Rector
As I’ve written about on several occasions, I’ve become interested in woodworking over the last twenty years. I’ve always envied those workers who could take a pile of lumber and turn it into a beautiful house. I’ve marveled at how effortlessly some folks can take a chunk of wood and create a beautiful item worth plenty of money. With the desire to create those kinds of things, I began collecting tools.
Most of the projects I’ve undertaken have run off the rails. Most of the time, I’ve managed to use a chop saw, skill saw, and table saw to cut a crooked line. No, I don’t know how that happened. Over time, the “measure twice and cut once” became part of my actions. Still, those lines run long or short, depending on the angle I’ve managed to run a straight-cutting saw.
Most of the items I’ve constructed are tables or small cabinets. I like those things because hiding mistakes is easy. The one thing that never works is having all four legs of equal length. I claim that floors are slanted, but folks roll their eyes and know I can’t cut a straight line. A small wedge or a stick-on pad usually solves the problem.
Amy has always wanted an outdoor shower for cleaning up after working outside in the flowers or my mowing or digging holes. For the longest time, I’ve ignored her wish because she wanted to hire someone to build the thing. This past week, I told her that the only way she would get an outdoor shower is if I built it. Of course, I knew that if this project turned out poorly, I would salvage the lumber and then hire someone to build the thing.
I began by becoming a computer genius. That means I used AI to create a blueprint, materials list, and step-by-step guide to constructing a 40 x 48 structure. Surprisingly, things began well. The decking for the shower went together just as it was supposed to. I stained the boards before attaching them to the frame, and the whole thing was square. That was a first.
I built the walls and attached the fence pickets to the back wall before setting it on the deck. Then the side walls were attached, and then the front wall, which was a bit more difficult to build, went up. I learned how to tie walls together, and then I blocked between the studs for extra strength and a place to nail on the outside pickets. I leveled the pickets, and I’ll be darned if the little shed looked fairly good.
The door for the shower was more difficult. I was a bit out of square, but a little cobbling made the appearance look better. In a weekend, I had finished the biggest project of my building life.
Before long, I’ll stain the wood to protect it from the elements. Then, Amy can contact Luke the plumber to run water to the thing. She wants hot and warm water, although I prefer not fooling with the hot water side. Maybe when Amy discovers the cost to run the sources out there, she will go with a shower head and hose hooked to the outdoor spigot that is already there.
Yes, I completed this big project, and I am proud of how well it turned out. Nothing rocks; nothing is too much out of the bubble. People who have seen this new structure are truly impressed with the improvement in my skills. Only one negative can be attached to this new building that I spent many hours constructing: the damn thing looks like an outhouse. It might be coming down, folks.
